Family Drama

Now that you know about the "Big Night Out" at MB, let me tell you the fall out portion. So I've been home for about a month when I get an out of the blue email from Bill (names changed so I didn't get killed by my family) my 20 year old cousin's mother. And I quote

has a $740 charge on his credit card from the night y'all all went drinking together. He says he paid the tab for everyone. Did y'all go any place after Captain Poo's? The receipt does not say Captain Poo's. It says Dog Leg Left.

We are trying to deal with his wild spending, drinking and honesty issues. He is going to a counselor today. It would help if we had our facts together.

Now at this point I'm thinking Shit, Damn Fuck we're busted and she's pissed. The other co conspirators and I decide to let me address the email and I'll handle Bill's Mom (BM). I proceed to fudge the truth b/c at this time I'm still trying to NOT tell anyone where we went b/c I just don't want to deal with the drama associated with that. Suffice it to say the conversation went down hill from there. The high points of my eventual telephone conversation with BM were

1. Bill didn't buy alcohol
2. Bill is an adult and needs to take responsibility for his actions
   
3. I have no guilt about going to a damn strip club b/c I'm of age and can make my own decisions
4. And I did nothing to feel sorry for.

At which point I find out that the dumbass went back the next night BY HIMSELF and spent a freakin grand at the club. So I go back to the original theme of the conversation

1. Bill is an adult and is responsible for his actions
2. I'm sorry (no not for getting caught see point numbers three and four above) but that she is dealing with this
3. Some people have to learn the hard way like 95% of my family including ME!
4. He'll eventually grow up but only if he is held responsible for his own actions

WE hang up on good terms and I congratulate myself for the mature and responsible way I handled the phone call. And then proceed to convene a conference call with my girls to gossip and dissect the conversations. This is on Tuesday night

So I go back to work on Wed and it's all good until about 5:30 PM when I get this blast email that just about blows the top of my head off.

If you get a call from the Horry County Police Department, it is because I have filed charges against the Crazy Horse for selling $1740.00 worth of alcohol and etc. to my 20 year old son. Y'all might be called on as witnesses.

Thanks for your assistance!

WTF?!?!?! Oh great, this means that on top of not holding him accountable for his actions, you've drug me, Jamie and my best friend into an asinine police report that could at some point in the future impact all of us. I don't need to be tied up in a police report in which I could be held accountable for contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Again been there, done that, escaped by the skin of my teeth on that one. No charges, b/c I didn't do anything wrong but it could have gone so much more badly for me than it did.

Plus this just pissed me off and told me that BM did not listen to what I said and is still living in her safe little world where nothing is Bill's fucking fault. GROW UP! The dude went back a second night by himself to spend a thousand dollars on some cute little dancer named Jewel. And she was cute and sweet, but get real! How does this translate into a complaint against the Crazy Horse. He's allowed in there at 18 and can spend whatever amount he wants on lap dances. THEY NEVER SERVED HIM ALCOHOL!!!!! They are not going to risk their ABC liquor license on some dumb 20 year old punk who spent some money there. The Crazy Horse is a freaking institution in North Myrtle Beach, it's been there for as long as I can remember.

So I and the others decide to just ignore this email and not respond. But by now I realize I'm going to need to do damage control because I am 100% positive that this little episode has made the family airwaves and I need to talk to my parents to ensure that I don't get relegated back to the "Awful Child" list that I've managed to NOT be on in at least 6 years. :)

Big night out at MB

This is a long one so just bear with me. I wasn't going to blog about this, but in the end it just too damn funny not to.

Let me set the stage for my latest family drama. As you know, my family vacations for a week at Myrtle Beach every year. This has been going on since before I was born people. Too many people of all ages stuffed into one house makes for some VERY interesting stories over the past years. But since we've all grown up and people have moved away, died, been born, just gotten older, etc, the number of people has changed from year to year. So this year, it me, my parents, my aunt, my cuz Jamie, my other aunt and uncle and my two of my bestest girlfriends on the planet in a four bedroom two bath house on the front row. Scattered among various other houses were other member of the extended family.

So one night we all decide to head out to a local "hotspot" that Jame Jame had found from talking to various people. The girls and Jamie head out to Captain Poo's local hotspot and proceed to hang out and the girls were drinking like fishes (which we'd done since we'd gotten to the beach on Saturday). My younger cousin we'll call Bill and my brother and his girlfriend show up and decide to hang for a while. this is all good until Captain Poo's decides to shut down for the evening and we have to find somewhere else to go. Now my brother and his girlfriend decide to be the smart ones and go home! Bill and the rest of us decide to stay out for a while. No big deal, until you start looking for a place in North Myrtle Beach the week before high season starts that's still open at 1 AM AND (drumroll please) allows under 21 to get in. Guess what the only place is that will allow this interesting combo to happen.....A Gentleman's Club!

So we proceed to traipse over to the Crazy Horse and the girls are going to continue to hang and drink b/c we just didn't want to go home yet. Bill, of course is 20 so he can't drink and Jamie is DD for the night. No biggie, we'll go, have a few more drinks, talk, laugh and head home before the sun comes up because I have NO desire to ever be awake and drinking when the sun comes up again. Been there, done that, have the bar bills to prove it and no thank you I'm too damn old for that anymore.

See now this is where things get interesting. Bill (the 20 yr old cousin) has a tiny little self esteem problem and has now decided to show his older cousins and her hot friends exactly how cool he is. And this is probably going to be two parts.

We show ID, pay our way into the Crazy Horse and find a table. Bill is off somewhere and when he gets to the table he tells us he's paid the bouncer/doorman to make sure we "are taken care of" and he's pulled $600 are and we won't have to pay for anything. My first response was WTF??! There's like 12 people in here, we don't need to pay to be taken care of, plus there's three women at the table and dancers for some reason swarm around tables with women and hwo the fuck are we going to spend $600 on drinks. Well duh, we didn't really see Bill for the rest of the night b/c he was off in the private room spending his $600 on lap dances. Whatever we had a really good time talking to the girls and drinking and then it was time to go home.

Here's the deal, we all agreed to NOT tell anyone where we went b/c it wouldn't go over well with the family AND Jamie and Bill had gotten into deep kimchi last year for doing this. So we tell NO ONE where we were and suffered the hangovers the next day like the big girls we were. Of course the girls were in bed by 10 the next night and I'm not sure Jamie even made it to 8 PM. But we're all old now and know when to get some sleep after being stupid the night before.